EU Debate Free Zone – F Zone Exclusive

referendum-free

To fall in-line with the BBC, the F Zone will not be campaigning on this momentous day.
Instead we take a look at how the airwaves will be filled until the results roll in – perhaps by using the plethora of latent broadcasting talent to be found amongst our soon to be redundant politicians.

Just a Minute

On Radio Four Nicholas Parsons will host a very short version of Just a Minute in which a succession of politicians can be heard failing spectacularly to speak for 60 seconds without deviation, hesitation, repetition or obfuscation.

One Song to the Tune of Another

Immediately following that, in the hastily reorganised schedules, Natalie Bennett will present I’m Sorry I Haven’t a Clue. The games will include an elaborate version of One Song to the Tune of Another, in which Boris will sing the words the Tory leadership campaign dressed up as a Vote Leave campaign.

Top Gear

Top Gear’s top team of Hammond, May and Clarkson make a surprise return and set up a race to see if a car can get to Brussels and back before the first result is announced. No one knows what it will prove, but it will be much better than the new Top Gear.

Supermarket Sweep

Dale’s Supermarket Sweep will also come back for one night only as two teams of MPs are given 60 seconds to fill a trolley with goods they believe will go up in price after the EU vote. The team with the most French cheese and German sausages will win.

Until Death Us Do Part

The long awaited sequel to Until Death Us Do Part returns for an election night special – with Warren Mitchell’s Alf Garnett played by Nigel Farage.

QI

Meanwhile the erudite, heir apparent Boris Johnson, will host a QI special flanked by super brainy politicos Two Brains Willets, Michael Gove, Mark Reckless and Jane Ellison – proving that blondes do indeed have more fun. (For a leader board showing the current status in the race for brightest MP click here).

Mr and Mrs

In a busy night Michael Gove will appear on Mr and Mrs to see whether his wife knows anything about his Angela Merkel fetish and the 9 other things you didn’t want to know about Micheal Gove listed here.